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Mar 20, 2014
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It’s mid-March, and the sun is pretty goddamn hot, so naturally you'll want to go to the official hangout for summer: ze beach.

Now, it might seem like an uncomplicated matter, but many of our fellow dudes still don't think proper swimwear isn’t important. "I got my basketball shorts anyway!” some say.

Wrong, just wrong, bro.

So, what should you wear to cover the lower half of your beach-hungry bod? Here it is, fellas: FHM's Guide To Beach Shorts!


THE BEACH-WORTHY ONES

Short type: Boardwalk

beach shorts guide

Pitts EZ Boardwalk, Rip Curl

These magical creations combine the comfort of normal shorts (for the non-sweaty-assed feel in the car) with just enough proper-swimwear feel in the water thanks to their cotton/synthetic construction. You know that moment where you’re walking along the shore late in the evening but isn’t planning to swim anymore, but then a rogue wave splashes your shorts and you get wet anyway, and now your shorts are going to take one million years to dry out? These joints are made for those moments.

Wear it: Always a great choice for hanging out on the sand or when you're looking for healthy servings of sea or pool H20 on your skin.


Short type:
Trunks

beach shorts guide

Navy Plain Swim Shorts, Topman

Trunks are cut higher than boardshorts for that extra feeling of freedom and pretty much come only in plain color blocked tones. It’s also much easier to pair a muted set of trunks with your top–as opposed to the pattern and color overload that could happen if you wear makulay shorts with that oh-so-trendy floral shirt you just bought. Get trunks if you plan on a lot of shore time in between swim seshs. Another plus point: They come with more than one pocket.

Wear it: Good for that hassle-free, "one with the sea" feel, will also not give you many headaches during the whole "terno" endeavor.


Short type:
Boardshorts

beach shorts guidePhantom Kingsroad 2.0, Hurley

These often come in louder colors and cray patterns compared to their shy brethren, and they are made out of exotic super light materials. That’s why boardshorts are the choice for the man who’s about to do some watersports–and want the crowd to know all about it. There are no seams that will chafe the skin off your ballsack and they're pretty stretchy so you can move around easily.

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Wear it: A resounding "Aprub!" if you're looking to up your man points via extreme watersports. Might need more effort when it comes to thinking or looking for a matching beach shirt or sando.


Short type:
Swimsuit

beach shorts guide

Breathe Shorts, Arena

If you’re serious about crushing some laps in the pool, then, by all means, go ahead with this hydrodynamic shred of cloth. If you’re wearing it to walk around on the beach you must either really hate untanned upper thighs or you're a foreign tourist. In other words: It's great for swimming fast, but you have to be prepared to welcome curious stares when you don it out of water.

Wear it: The skin-tight construction can give you an edge when it comes to racing your boardshorts-wearing friends in the water. You can always use the "I'm a pro, all I care about is speed" line when asked why the hell your upper thighs are so nakakasilaw compared to the unshielded parts of your legs.

NEXT: The beach no-nos–aka "Please lang, wag mo isusuot ito!"


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