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Dec 18, 2012
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Since it's just a week before we celebrate the birth of the most awesome human to have ever lived, we came up this timely, slightly kooky question: If dear ol' Santa Claus was a tech-geek, what do you think are the gadgets he would be giving out?

Brain addling, isn't it? Well, FHM did a little bit of brainstorming and here are the devices we think the jolly chubby man in the red suit would have.

1. Mobile phone

                                     We imagine something more hi-tech than this... (image source)

Why it's a Santa must-have: We know he's is not alone in his quest to make kids happy; the elves are an important part of the deal, too. We've seen a ton of Christmas-themed movies to know that Santa's little helpers form a huge group, maybe a hundred or even a thousand-strong army of gift-making midgets. As such, we think it would be very wise if Santa will have a handset, as well as each of his elves. Throw in an unlitxt deal, too! Because, frankly, it would be a pain in the behind to approach each one of 'em personally. Text text na lang, 'di ba?

2. Tablet for using Google Maps

Spotted over the north pole. He's real!

Why it's a Santa must-have: As stories go, Santa doesn't fail to put gifts under Christmas trees or inside Christams socks. We don't know how he does it, especially since we're talking about visiting every home around the whole goddamn world here. Seems like he doesn't get lost (unlike some of us who can't even remember where we last parked our car). Maybe he uses Google Maps, on a tablet at that, for easy viewing? We wouldn't be surprised if he does.

3. CCTV cameras


He's watching you..so be good

Why it's a Santa must-have: Okay, it seems a bit creepy, but how does Santa take tabs on who's naughty or nice? Remember, he's only one man, although a very iconic one. Our guess? CCTV cameras! He might've installed one on each home to see how the kids have been for the year. And, kids, don't bother searching for his cameras since we're also pretty sure he also sprinkled some magic powder to make it invisible.

4. A supercomputer

Believe us, this bad boy deserves its name...

Why it's a Santa must-have: All that information and gift requests from the millions, nay, billions of kids around the world has to go through and be processed by something, right? Your Core i7 with 8GB of RAM won't cut it, we need something much more powerful. Think a supercomputer, like this!

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5. A big-ass screen

It would be perfect in our living rooms, too

Why it's a Santa must-have: And the perfect pair for that supercomputer we just mentioned? A big-ass TV that would be displayed inside Santa's HQ in the North Pole not only for himself but also for his horde of elves.

NEXT: Santa's on FaceBook!


WORDS: NEPS FIRMALAN
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