If you’re spending Valentine’s Day alone and are currently wringing your hands at the unfairness of it all, stop. Being with someone on Valentine’s Day doesn’t necessarily mean that a happily ever after is in the cards, as the stories of these eight people prove. From bad dates to embarrassing moments to cheating discoveries, these V-Day fails will make you glad you’re single AF, or if you’re coupled up, make you wonder whether your S.O.’s silence means something more. (Just kidding. We hope it doesn’t.)
The one where the surpriser became the surprisee
“I had purposely gotten in a fight with my boyfriend in the leadup to Valentine’s Day so that I could surprise him with a bunch of presents once the day came. So for three days before Valentine’s Day, we didn’t talk.
On Valentine’s Day, I went to his house bearing gifts to surprise him. As I stood outside his bedroom, I could hear his bed creaking—and you know what that means. I barged into his room and saw him having sex with another girl, a female friend we sometimes hung out with. He had insisted before that there was nothing going on between him and that girl, and I believed him.
I went wild and threw the gifts I brought him across the room. In my rage, I grabbed the edge of the sheet that was covering them both, forcing the girl to run to the bathroom to hide. My boyfriend had the audacity to say, ‘It’s not what you think!’
Needless to say, we broke up. They became a couple after that.” – Cess, 20
The one that was a sign of bad things to come
“For Valentine’s Day, since I couldn’t be with my long-distance boyfriend, I planned to surprise him by ordering a special cake I knew he would love and having it delivered to his house.
As Valentine’s Day approached, I didn’t mention anything about the delivery because I wanted to keep it a surprise, so I just greeted him a 'happy Valentine’s Day' in the morning. I didn’t hear from him that whole day—no V-Day greeting, no nothing—but I just told myself that he was busy.
Once he got home that night and saw my gift, that’s when he texted me to say thank you and to return my greeting. He said he didn’t have a gift for me, but that trip we took together a month prior, the plane tickets for which he had paid for, could that be his gift? I found it lazy, seeing as that trip and Valentine’s Day were two different things entirely, but I didn’t want to make a big deal out of it so I let it slide. But I remember going to bed that night feeling that things were not what they used to be.
I was right, because that Valentine’s Day signaled the start of his pulling away. Turns out, he was already dating someone else. Exactly a month later, he broke up with me—ON MY BIRTHDAY.” – Polly, 34
The one where a slow dance became a woe dance
“This happened at my high school prom, which coincided with Valentine’s Day. I walked over to this girl I liked to ask her to dance. What I didn’t know was that the guy sitting beside her at her table was courting her and that she liked him back. Still, she agreed to dance with me.
While we were on the dance floor, halfway through the song, she suddenly walked out on me, without any warning. She went back to the guy at her table, leaving me standing on the dance floor dumbfounded. The people around us saw it happen, and I was humiliated as hell.
I walked out of the hall and went to the comfort room to splash water on my face, calm myself down, and think of how I could go back inside and save face. Good thing three of my female friends, having witnessed my humiliation, went to look for me and asked me to dance with them.
That girl is still with the guy she left me on the dance floor for, so I guess it all worked out in the end?” – Ton, 23
The one where the boyfriend went off with the best friend
“It happened in 2015. At the end of January, I found out that my boyfriend had cheated on me with one of my best friends. They were drunk; he crossed the line with her on a dare. I was extremely upset. He was my first boyfriend and the girl was like a sister to me. He went to my house, begged for forgiveness, and said it was a one-time thing. Being young and naive (and totally in love), I gave him a second chance. I also had a heart-to-heart with the girl; she apologized and promised to give me space to fix things with him.
On Valentine’s Day, I expected him to spend time with me since we were mending our relationship. But he never made plans with me; instead, we partied with our barkada, which included the girl. That same night, my two close friends took me aside and told me flat out that he was two-timing me. I was still in denial so I didn’t believe them at first.
Two days later, he broke up with me to be with her. He admitted that on Valentine’s Day, they had kissed. He also admitted that they had been seeing each other in secret since the previous year. He showed me all their text conversations, proving that they were really together.
I found out that it wasn’t just him who was lying to me—so was she. Instead of giving us space like she had promised, she was the one initiating interactions with him. That broke my heart the most.” – Bridget, 25
The one with a gift from the heavens above
“On Valentine’s Day back in high school, there was a schoolwide program and all the students and faculty were gathered at the quadrangle, which was an open space. I had ordered flowers for my girlfriend that I meant to give her before the program, but the flowers got delivered to me late, while the program was ongoing.
I didn’t mean to cause a scene, but I decided to hand her the flowers during the program. As I did, the students followed me with their eyes as I walked over to her clutching those flowers. As they erupted in teasing cheers, I felt like a romantic badass.
As I went back to my seat, a bird flying right above me promptly shat on me. We were in civilian attire then and I had on a light-colored shirt, so the bird poop streaks were VERY visible. Naturally, the cheers turned into laughter.
So much for looking like a romantic badass.” – Mzee, 33
The one where the single rose held a deeper meaning
“A decade ago, I thought I would have a great Valentine’s Day, as any girl in a relationship would expect. Well, it kind of was as my boyfriend back then did the works—a nice date, an expensive gift, and a single rose.
A few months later, I found out that my boyfriend had been seeing a girl on the side, whom he met for the first time just as he was buying me a bouquet of flowers for that Valentine’s Day! The reason why I ended up with just a single rose that day was because he ended up giving this new girl the entire bouquet instead.
They had been dating for a few months when I found out about the affair while I was using my boyfriend’s phone to make a call. She had texted him some sappy shit while I was on his phone and I took note of the number. Later, I confronted both of them about it, and the girl admitted everything—including the mystery of the single rose.
I have never celebrated Valentine’s Day since then.” – Lhen, 32
The one with all the eating and pooping (yes, it is exactly what it sounds like)
“Years ago, I was dating a Swedish health professional who was here studying the spread of sexually transmitted diseases. On Valentine’s Day, I went to his apartment a few hours before our dinner date. He seemed pretty agitated and soon admitted that as part of his ‘research’ the day before, he got dragged to this big party which devolved into a full-on orgy. In the middle of this wild bacchanal, somebody slipped him a cocktail of party drugs.
Among the drugs’ many side effects was that he was extremely hungry. So even if we already had reservations at a fancy restaurant in Greenbelt, he ended up pigging out first at a nearby Gerry’s Grill. Soon after this filling meal, he had a strong urge to use the toilet and poop out his guts. He recovered in time for our Valentine’s dinner and again developed a ravenous appetite. But same as earlier, he had to rush back to the throne around the time we were getting the bill.
This binge-and-purge pattern replayed a few more times over the rest of the evening. It came to a point where the only places left to buy food from were Ministop and 7-Eleven. We also had to go around Makati looking for a toilet with a bidet because he had already used up so much toilet paper and his behind was starting to chafe.
To his credit, he was extremely apologetic and was back to almost normal just before sunrise, enough to salvage our date.” – Topher, 38
The one with the plot twist that would make M. Night Shyamalan proud
“For Valentine’s Day, I dated this girl who had just gotten out of a relationship. She had complained that her ex-boyfriend no longer put any effort into their relationship, so I went all out for our date—a fancy dinner, flowers, a box filled with sweets and handwritten letters and stuff she said she liked, the works.
At the end of the night, she admitted that she was a lesbian. By the next week, she was already dating a girl.” – Armand, 22