Once a month, a girl’s aura transforms into a dark, question mark-shaped cloud of pure emotion. Unless she's clinically crazy, our diagnosis is this: P-M-S-!
Pre-Menstrual Syndrome, a.k.a. Every Boyfriend’s Days Of Doom, starts a week or two before a woman’s period. During these days, most women in their fertile years go through different symptoms, which might consist of the following: bloated stomach, fatigue, acne breakouts, food cravings, and a literal catalogue of emotions including rage, depression, and loss of any interest to smother their partners with affection.
Unlike natural disasters with known causes, the biological explanation behind this unexplainable and often scary female phenomenon is still unknown—even to the Einsteins of the world!
PMS doesn’t only make a woman obsess over water weight; it also causes the following things:
a) A lot of fights between relationships simply because some guys just can’t deal with it.
b) The raging hormones make women a little cuckoo.
c) Unexpected table-banging:
But instead of avoiding contact or trying to match your lady’s inexplicable and sudden urge to change moods and eat a bag of Cheetos, this edition of the FHM GF Manual will give you some tips on how to survive a PMS-ridden week—not complete cures, mind you, but tips that would make life with the PMS-er a little more livable!
1) Know your girl’s cycle
As long as you share intimate moments, it is every guy’s unwritten responsibility to be on top of their lady’s menstrual cycle. PMS starts one or two weeks before she gets the red wave, so if she becomes a little weird on all levels on these days, you can count on it that it’s PMS.
Those who suffer from high-level PMS are usually in their late twenties and thirties. If your girlfriend is 18 and showing intense symptoms all the time, it might not be PMS. She’s just complaining a lot.
2) Listen to her freak out, and then reassure her
During this sensitive stage, seemingly meaningless nods in reference to another hot woman can lead to total verbal abuse and a display of psychosis. A “Hey, this model looks cute!” as you flip through this month’s FHM issue can elicit a response such as “I knew it, you secretly like white, sexy girls. Sige, pakasalan mo yang magazine mo ha,” followed by a long list of physical insecurities.
"Mukha ba akong bampira sa'yo?!"
Instead of freaking out just like her, listen until she’s calmed down and assure her that she’s the most beautiful woman in the world for you. Count to five until she says “Sorry.”