The tweet of
According to netizens, Diane shared her story on Twitter because upon reporting her situation to the school admin, her ex-boyfriend was only made to do community service and was excluded from participating in the graduation ceremonies, which she felt was too lenient given what he did to her.
Gabriela Youth, which is under Gabriela Women’s Party, called on the UST admin to give proper sanctions fitting for the crime committed against Diane and the other women who were also allegedly abused by Kyle Viray.
Netizens also shared their thoughts about Kyle Viray’s case, the disappointment over their school’s actions (or lack thereof), and even their experiences (both men and women) under an abusive partner.
The traumatic experience of Kyle Viray’s ex-girlfriend is not an isolated case. According to the latest data by the Philippines National Demographic and Health Survey (NDHS), one in four (26 percent) married women, aged 15 to 49 has experienced physical, sexual, or emotional violence by their husband or partner. Moreover, 20 percent of women have experienced emotional violence, 14 percent have experienced physical violence, and 5 percent have experienced sexual violence by their current or most recent husband or partner.
What’s worse is that the data above are all reported cases. Imagine all the underreported and unreported cases of men and women who have experienced abuse, but lack the courage to tell their stories.
When people hear that someone is in an abusive relationship, their initial reaction, is most likely: "Why don’t you just break up with him/her?!" If you’ve never experienced being
We interviewed men and women who were once in different kinds of abusive relationships—and they tell us why they stayed and what made them finally decide to call it quits.
He was her first—and she believed that the physical abuse was normal and would eventually go away
“It started after our first anniversary when he started physically hurting me. There are many instances that whenever we fight and I won’t follow what he wants, it will result in him punching and kicking me. And whenever I cry,
I know I should’ve walked away when I had a chance. But I was too blinded by love because he was my first boyfriend. I thought it was just a spur of the moment or natural lang
He was afraid she’d harm herself if he left her
“In my past relationship, the physical abuse was being done by my girlfriend—on herself. Pag nag-
I tried to understand her. I was always there for her supporting her, talking to her. But her demons are bigger. I tried convincing her mom to have her checked, but they said ‘Ikaw lang
I felt responsible for her, I felt guilty. But I realized that they were controlling and manipulating me. It was emotional abuse. I love her so much and I love her family as well. Pero
She believed it was her fault
“My ex-boyfriend was really
Sabi ko noon sa sarili ko baka kasalanan ko kaya siya ganun kasi dapat nga naman di ako nakikipag-usap sa ibang lalake at dapat maayos yung damit ko. Tumagal kami for 3 years na ganun. Kahit na sinunod ko lahat ng gusto niya—di ako nakikipag-usap sa iba, di ako nagsusuot ng maikli, meron at meron pa rin siyang ikinagagalit at minumura at sinasaktan niya pa rin ako. Yung realization na mali pala yun ay nangyari noong I compared ourselves to my friends na in a relationship—di naman ganun yung mga partner nila. Doon ko na-realize na wala sa akin ang mali—nasa kanya. At kahit anong pagbago ko sa sarili ko, balewala, kasi siya ang problema.
For him, words hurt more than the scars and bruises
“It was not just my ego that was hurt when I was in a mentally abusive relationship with my ex-girlfriend—
It took me five years before realizing this. It was hard to break up with her,