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NERDGASM: The Top 15 Videogame Boobs Of All Time!

They’re the reason why we keep on fighting, the reason why we have the strength to overcome any obstacle or beat any boss in videogames!
by Chris Martin | Oct 16, 2014
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They’re the reason why we keep on fighting, the reason why we have the strength to overcome any obstacle or beat any boss in videogames. No, we’re not talking about the power-ups or the satisfaction you get from saving the universe.

We’re talking about boobs. Because you have to admit, videogames aren’t the same without them.

But of the hundreds of pairs of digital tatas out there, there will always be the best ones. And after playing hundreds of games and abusing the pause and jump button (and 12 rolls of tissue later), we managed to rank the top 15 boobs videogames have to offer. (Trust us, it's not as easy as it looks!)

Let’s get jiggy with it!


Series: Duke Nukem

A screen-cap from the original game:

And one from the obviously newer, Duke Nukem: Forever:

Back in the '90s, it didn't even matter that they were pixelated. Their tassel-licious bonkers were instant boner-growers for 12-year-old us. Also, the game Duke Nukem taught us that as long as we have cash, we have boobs—thus proving that it might not have been the best game to play at that age.

Relive it here:

Video via swarly91

14)   POISON

Series: Street Fighter

Image via Pinterest

Everybody once thought that she was the hottest girl in the Street Fighter series (sorry, Cammy). She’s got the breasts, the thighs, the abs…and then we later found out she’s also got a penis. Uhm. (Hey, we didn’t say it’s a list of top female boobage.)

The real-life equivalent:

Image via


Series: Halo

She’s the reason why we guys wish we had Master Chief’s helmet. Who doesn’t want a hot holographic A.I. popping out of our visors to give us a show (oh, and to guide is in our missions or whatever)?

Continue reading below ↓

The real-life equivalent:

Image via


Series: Super Smash Bros.

Image via

Intergalactic cutie, Zero Suit Samus Aran, is definite proof that the grand Nintendo beat-em-up, Super Smash Bros., ain’t just for kids. It’s for naughty kids as well. Otherwise, Nintendo wouldn't have been so adamant in making Samus' space suit so tight. We’re still hoping there would be a Birthday Suit Samus Aran DLC in the future. Make it happen, Nintendo!

For now, we'll settle for this action figure right here:

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