Sex is undeniably one of the most exciting parts of a relationship. However, as years pass by, it can sometimes turn into a regular, boring routine.
Although you can't hop into a time machine and bring back those steamy nights, there's still a way to reclaim that sexual spark you and your lover once had.
Kay Bunagan, a co-founding psychologist at Better Steps Psychology, Inc., says it could be as simple as injecting something new into your sex life or taking a break from the usual, montotonous manner in which you bump uglies.
"Taking a staycation as a couple, or indulging in a dress up candlelit dinner can help reignite your sex life. You can also take a vacation to new places, " Bunagan shares.
A study conducted by Expedia adds that a vacation can help couples set the mood and boost libido. Dr. Linda Papadopoulos, psychologist and lead researcher of the study, further explains: "Traveling can help reduce the levels of the stress hormone cortisol. As stress and anxiety decreases, mood increases—bringing many, often unexpected, positive benefits in how we perceive ourselves, motivation and productivity, and our general outlook on life."
Also, take time to to talk about what excites you and your partner. Ask about the things each one wants to try. Listen to each other and be open-minded when it comes to new ways of executing intercourse.
"Be mindful of boundaries, but also be open to new experiences," Bunagan reminds. "Pay attention to each other and to the little details. Allot regular time every week for exclusive couple time and vary the activities that you do. Change is good for sex."
As for Maribeth Brown, a family and relationships counselor from Las Piñas City, it's best for couples to get creative.
"Try to make love in other places other than your the bedroom. Break out of your routine and experiment with other sex positions. Your options are actually endless," she says.
Openness is the key to a harmonious sex life. Both of you should be able to express your wants and needs when it comes to activities between the sheets.
It's also important to avoid arguments, says Brown. "As you spend more years together, stressors like work or money issues are shared, which can affect mood and add fatigue," she says. As much as you can, resist opening your mouth and uttering painful words despite the stress of the daily grind. Instead, understand where your partner is coming from.
On top of these, Bunagan and Brown agree that communication is the most important component to a fulfilling sexual relationship. Sharing thoughts, they say, will help address issues even before it takes over your sex life.