Turns out, being good-looking is not as important as you may think when it comes to attracting a woman. Of course, it’s definitely a plus for some, but really, it’s not the end-all and be-all of attraction.
Don’t believe us? Well, women online, in a recent r/AskReddit thread, revealed some of the things that turn them on—and surprisingly, it’s way beyond having a killer jawline and rock hard abs. And what shocked us, too, is that most of the things that ladies found attractive are the things that some men are quite ashamed and insecure of.
Being passionate about something
“Nerding out about something. There's nothing more attractive than being passionate about a hobby or ideal. An opportunity to learn something new is hot.” –
“Not making a lot of money but showing an incredible work ethic. My husband made $9/hr when I met him but he does everything with such diligence and precision that I knew he and I were a match. I luckily got a degree that earns well so I am the primary breadwinner and he is now a stay at home dad. His attention to details keeps our house running and I am able to see his strengths outside of his earning potential. That's the great thing about our more progressive society, we can ignore tradition and do what makes us happy.” –
“I don't know if this is something men are actively ashamed of, but I find it really attractive when they have very put-together domestic lives. Doing their own laundry and ironing their clothes, planning meals and grocery shopping, and keeping their homes reasonably tidy are all ridiculously sexy. Also, having feminine interests and not feeling like less of a man!” –
“Lack of experience. Guys who didn't have a lot of partners (I don't like guys who brag about how many women they had in their bed).” – Catcackatoo
“My now fiance had never been intimate with anyone until he met me. He used to be embarrassed about it seeing as he was about 23 when we met, but I didn't see it as anything to be ashamed of at all. He's a wonderful partner and it didn't negatively affect our relationship at all.” – CarFullOfRadios
Being shy and reserved
“I really don't mind awkwardness, and prefer it over someone who's brash and loud.” –
“Personally it's a turn-off when guys are just too aloof to function but I find it really endearing when it's obvious that they're nervous or naturally shy and make an effort to talk to you anyway, even if the conversation awkwardly lulls at certain points. It shows initiative on your part, and I think a lot of women find it attractive when guys allow their vulnerabilities to show. I have a much easier time finding something to talk about with a guy when I can relate to them (talking to someone for the first time is always going to be a little daunting!) and feel like I can let my guard down too, instead of trying to match their confidence and make a stellar first impression.” –
Not being afraid to show emotions
“When a guy is not ashamed to talk about his feelings and he doesn’t play cool ‘so that she doesn’t think I’m desperate or something’.” – angry_baboon
“Being open, communicative, and honest about their feelings. Nothing worse than a guy who doesn’t want to acknowledge or talk about their emotions... especially because it usually ends up escalating into a huge argument/thing.
And along those lines, not being afraid to show those emotions just because you’re around your friends. My
“Being openly sentimental or sensitive. It's total crap that guys aren't allowed to get too emotional over memories or meaningful things the way women can.
I think vulnerability in a man is incredibly attractive because it means he is secure with who he is. I realize there's a lot of pressure amongst men to be tough, so as a woman, I feel it's kind of my duty to help create an environment where men are okay with showing their soft side.” –