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Your Sex And Love Predictions, Based On Your Chinese Zodiac Sign
Get ready to unleash the dragon
by Chandra Pepino | Feb 16, 2018
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2018 is the Chinese Year of the Dog, and we can only think of one fun thing to do with your girl involving doggy (it’s walking your dogs at the park, you perverts). Kidding aside, your Chinese zodiac sign is different from your tropical zodiac sign, so if you’d like to deep-dive into a more nuanced level of self-awareness, especially when it comes to love, then read on, and kung hei fat choi.

Year of the Rat

2008, 1996, 1984, 1972, 1960

Rats are natural-born leaders, and their sense of resolve and restraint is often the result of a rough childhood or a traumatic experience from the past. As such, they tend to be careful with their relationships, too. This year, slacken the reins a bit, whether that means letting your girl take control in bed, or diving into an exciting new relationship without looking back. Rats also tend to be a bit arrogant, something a romantic partner might not appreciate so consider depuffing that chest if you enjoy being taken.

Year of the Ox

2009, 1997, 1985, 1973, 1961

Much like their animal namesake, you Oxens work hard. Let’s just say you also work hard to get hard. Work might prove to be extra-taxing this year, so be sure to channel those latent frustrations into sexytime. Your girl knows she can always count on you, but sometimes, you build walls that make it difficult for her to talk about moving from one relationship stage to the next. Perhaps some clarity is in order this year? Time to check those labels before the relationship expires. 

Year of the Tiger

2010, 1998, 1986, 1974, 1962

AGH! Would you be a little less charming? It’s hurting our eyes. People are naturally drawn to you, which makes exploring new relationships a tad easier for you than most. Brave Tigers aren’t afraid to explore in bed, so put the king of the jungle to shame (wala namang Year of the Lion) by checking off at least one daring bedroom milestone. Your first threesome? Venturing into light BDSM? The prowl is on.

Year of the Rabbit

2011, 1999, 1987, 1975, 1963

You Rabbits are smart as a whip, which makes you prime long-term partners—but you tend to shy away from conflict. Unlike actual rabbits, you don’t get to dig a hole in the ground and hide from your problems, so resolve to face them head-on this year. Your partner will appreciate it. Make like Bugs Bunny and ask her, “What’s up?” This applies to your bedroom habits, too. Don’t be afraid to teach her to kiss you a certain way or give oral the way you like it. We don’t say “fucking like rabbits” for nothing!

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Year of the Dragon

2012, 2000, 1988, 1976, 1964

Those born in the Year of the Dragon are dynamic, adaptive people. Change doesn’t terrify you, which means you like to keep your freedom close. But where does that leave your partner? Relationships need nurturing, so don’t scare her away with that fire—this year, she deserves definitive assurances. Save that fire for your bedroom romps, where your creativity will definitely pay off.

Year of the Snake

2013, 2001, 1989, 1977, 1965

One word: relax. Snakes can get pretty intense, but that’s only because you guys are good at reading people like the back of your hand, er, endoskeleton. But—long, slithery but—this also means you have a tendency to make wrongful assumptions about your partner. When you’re hashing things out, let her speak. Then you can shed your skin (get it?) and enjoy all the ensuing makeup sex.

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Year of the Horse

2014, 2002, 1990, 1978, 1966

The great thing is you guys are nothing like BoJack Horseman: you’re sincere, which any partner is sure to appreciate. Your sincerity also makes you naive at times. This year, endeavor to enjoy time away from your relationship—self-love is just as important. Same goes for your sex life. Your right hand will never let ya down.

Year of the Goat/Sheep

2015, 2003, 1991, 1979, 1967

If you were born in the Year of the Goat, you prefer peace above all else. You’d rather drop arguments now instead of talking things through. Well and good for the short term, absolutely disastrous for the long term. 2018 is the year you learn to face the music. After all, what’s love without a little hardship? Under the sheets, though, peace (read: keeping it slow and sensual) is the way to go.

Year of the Monkey

2016, 2004, 1992, 1980, 1968

Hindi ka ba napapagod? Granted, people find your sense of ambition and constant thirst for adventure super sexy, but this year, we implore you to banish that fear of inertia. Commitment doesn’t mean the death of your fun Friday nights. Marriage doesn’t mean the end of kilig. Instead of keeping potential partners (both romantic and sexual) on their toes, it might be time to sweep them off their feet.

Year of the Rooster

2017, 2005, 1993, 1981, 1969

Your practicality has served you well all these years, but (caution: #RealTalk) this tends to make you a bit of a boring partner as time passes. Rekindle that flame in 2018 by showing genuine interest in your lover’s passions. Relationships blossom best when there is mutual support, so be proud of her and let her like what she likes. (That means going along with her medyo weird kinks. Hey, don’t knock it ‘till you try it!)

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Year of the Dog

2018, 2006, 1994, 1982, 1970

Dogs are generous, fiercely loyal, and kind-hearted. All fantastic traits, we assure you, but they also make you vulnerable to being manipulated or taken advantage of. This year, whether you’re single or taken, choose yourself. Your big heart will make it hard to do that, but trust us, a little selfishness here and there won’t hurt. Except in bed. Continue to give, give, give in that department.

Year of the Pig

2019, 2007, 1995, 1983, 1971

We know you love to get affectionate, but relationships are more than just the physical—it’s vital to stay attuned to your partner’s emotional needs as well. Honesty comes naturally to you, so this shouldn’t be that much of a challenge. As for sex, well, you’re the one zodiac sign on this list who doesn’t need much help. Love away, ya filthy animals.

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