Since we Pinoys collectively want to save (or earn) as much as we possibly can when it comes to our beloved rides, we have a large and lively buy-and-sell community solely for trading car stuff. The sheer number of people online makes it easy to reach potential trade mates but it also means you have to deal with a whole lot of headaches. Here are the phrases everyone who’s tried to make a deal online should be familiar with.
1. “PM for price”
The bane of online shoppers everywhere, around 50% of items for sale online are listed as “PM for price,” because secrecy is a big thing apparently. Sometimes the seller will actually respond to your PM in a timely manner, sometimes he ends up replying with the price to someone who goes “hm” in the comments anyway, often what actually happens is the seller only replies after a long time and you’ve already moved on in life. The best though is when you get the legendary “tulog muna ako balikan kita,” or a variation of it.
2. “Sir hm”
The alter-ego of number one. Even with a clearly marked price, you still get braindead comments going “hm.” Not even with a "sir" or "po" for courtesy, you get triggered because do people just not read? But being a seller, you need patience if you want to move your stuff so you indulge these comments. It then inevitably leads to a spiral of comments that go:
3. “FREE, P123, P1,”
Despite Facebook’s best efforts at giving us functional tools for online transactions, some people just can’t be bothered. How many items have you seen listed as FREE, or P1, or even P987,654,321 only for the seller to write the damn price in the description anyway (or say PM for price, of course).
4. “Baka pwede mo dagdag 100 sir pamasahe ko lang?”
If you post up an item for sale with specific meeting locations listed down, prepare to be disappointed. Makati only? “Sir baka pwede Gateway.” And if you aren’t already being lowballed for whatever transaction, prepare to be asked for their pamasahe as well.
5. “Pic for attention only”
Sometimes you don’t have an actual picture of what you want, and that’s okay—grab something off the internet. What's not okay is when you post a totally unrelated photo that just confuses people even more.
6. “Sir pwede swap”
Post something “for sale” and it is guaranteed that you will get a swap offer. And vice versa. Sometimes this phenomenon creeps into the seller themselves:
7. “Sir, last price?”
Posted something at its last price already? Maybe you even wrote down "FIXED" for good measure? That’s never enough to stop supremely confident window shoppers from throwing a lower offer or “hm lp?” at you.
8. “Pwede po ba sa Vios”
Have a part explicitly described as for a certain car? Maybe it’s a set of wheels with full spec and measurements listed down. There will always be that guy with a Vios (it’s almost always a Vios) who genuinely has no clue what fits on his car, or just really doesn’t read. And then you have sellers who can't take hints from a group name:
9. “Magbasa wag tamad”
All these moronic traditions have obviously gotten to the heads of some sellers, as passive-aggressive disclaimers like “magbasa muna” have become their weapon of choice.
10. “Lady owned/lady driven”
Despite it being 2018, some sellers still resort to this sexist comment. What does this actually mean though? Is it the belief that girls don’t rough up or drive their cars hard? Or is it secretly a warning that a tita, who doesn’t know what basic maintenance is and backs into objects with a shrug, was the former driver?