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Jul 28, 2011
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You know Manila has really become a concert hotbed when not just one, but two foreign acts are taking their talents to our town in the same weekend. 30 Seconds to Mars will be playing tomorrow, July 29 at Trinoma. Incubus, on the other hand, will be in town to perform at the Araneta Coliseum Today, July 28, for the Philippine Leg of their "If Not Now, When? World Tour."

Now, where there is a concert involving Brandon Boyd, you can be pretty much sure that the groupies will be coming in by the dozens. What can we say? The dude’s a charmer (you can bet the girls will be screaming his name at the concert), and more than just his simple rockstar appeal, you need not go far from his body of work to know that he knows how to deal with women.

In fact, that’s exactly what we did. We took a look at the band’s discography (thank you, Wikipedia), and scrutinized (looked at the song titles) to prove that Brandon has this whole relationship/dating thing down pat. The entire process of meeting a girl, falling in love, and the eventual breakup can be plotted through these 11 Incubus songs and lyrics that have been taken slightly out of context. Hey, at the very least, you can tell yourself that you still had a great time listening to these tunes.

Chapter 1: You’re at a club. Someone catches your eye.

"You Will Be A Hot Dancer"

The song goes: “I see a head afraid to be himself, I bet he'd to have a little encouragement from the opposite…”

You’re a little bit hesitant, seeing how she might be a little out of your league. She’s hot and all, and you’re just an average chump. You keep yourself at a distance, taking a swig from time to time, as you continue to keep an eye on her like a loving stalker.

Chapter 2: You get drunk

"Make A Move"

The song goes: “Maaaake a move!”

Congratulations, you’ve reached the point where alcohol blesses you with a bravery badge, and finally you make a move. You go for it, you pull out an awful pickup line from God-knows-where, and because we’re fantasizing here, we’ll just say you two amazingly hit it off well.

Chapter 3: You get lucky

"Deep Inside"

The song goes: “It's 3 o'clock, and we ask ourselves, "Where are we now?"

Either you two really hit it off really, really well, or she just happened to be really, really drunk. In any case, you’re in a motel with her where you talk about marriage, and kids, and dogs. Yeah, that’s not really what you two did, you lucky bastard. 

NEXT: How about some Summer Romance?