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Jun 9, 2015
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 You’d think that after three movie installments that the fossil-resurrecting moguls in Jurassic Park would’ve learned that their business model doesn’t work. Dumb humans. But here they are again in Jurassic World—the fourth and latest film—playing God and unleashing prehistoric terror on mankind.

Set twenty-two years after the horrific events of Isla Nubar, the film stars everyone’s favorite bumbling leading man Chris Pratt as Owen, a dino-wrangler who works at the fully-functional dinosaur theme park that’s been running for ten years. When clientele rates decline, the corporation behind the freak sideshow decides that creating a hybrid monster will draw in more visitors. Genius. And in true Jurassic fashion, a whole lot of running, screaming, and death ensues for your personal entertainment.

In celebration of JW’s release in theaters tomorrow, June 9, here’s a rundown of your fave character’s that have fallen prey to the claws and fangs of the deadly dinosaurs.

Enjoy!


THE MOVIE: JURASSIC PARK

Robert Muldoon

He was the park’s resident hunter, but when the power outage allows the Velociraptors to roam free, not even his rifle could save him from being devoured by one of the, as he calls it, “clever girls”.


Video via Movieclips


Donald Gennaro

In what is probably one of the most embarrassing fatalities in the franchise, the corporate crony who was handling the park’s legal/money matters gets eaten while hiding in the toilet. Serves him right for leaving the two helpless kids to fend for themselves. Turns out, even the Tyrannosaurus Rex hates lawyers.


Video via Movieclips


Mr. Arnold

After Laura Dern’s Dr. Ellie Sattler restores electricity to the park, she discovers the severed arm of technician Mr. Arnold, courtesy of a raptor on the loose. Played by character actor Samuel L. Jackson, the role was minor but it set up the dread that would chase our heroine soon after. 


Video via Movieclips

 

Dennis Nedry

As he tries to steal some cryogenically frozen dinosaur DNA, disgruntled employee Dennis Nedry loses control of his vehicle and crashes onto a ditch. Before he can winch his way out, a creepy Dilophosaurus pays him some unwanted attention. The result: a spit of venom to his face before the slimy creature mauls him. It’s considered to be one of the original’s most memorable sequences.


Video via Movieclips


THE MOVIE: THE LOST WORLD: JURASSIC PARK

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Peter Ludlow

Suits don’t really fare well in these flicks. After kidnapping a baby T-Rex and bringing it back to the city of San Diego, the big boss planning the park in this sequel becomes dinner to the infant dino.


Video via Movieclips


Dieter Stark

The Procompsognathus was a sordid addition to the dinosaur lineup in The Lost World. They become even more repulsive in our eyes when a pack of these tiny tormentors feast on an a-hole wrangler, picking on his nose and lips as he slowly bleeds lifeless.


Video via Movieclips


Eddie Carr

What’s worse than being attacked by one T-Rex? Being ripped in half and dined upon by two!


Video via Movieclips


Dr. Robert Burke  

When a Rex invades their base camp, the troop of wranglers makes a run for it. Some of them hide out in a waterfall, where a snake freaks out the hippy-looking Dr. Burke. Naturally, he runs towards the rampaging T-Rex.


Video via Movieclips


THE MOVIE: JURASSIC PARK 3

Cooper

The Spinosaurus’ first victim is the poor mercenary who’s left behind by the rest of the team. He’s snapped up, chomped, and causes the aircraft his mates are riding to make a crash landing.


Video via Movieclips


Mr. Udesky

This mercenary gets a taste of raptor rage when he’s stabbed in the back by a razor sharp claw. Smart predators that they are, they then use their victim’s cadaver to booby-trap the remaining survivors.


Video via Movieclips


M.B. Nash

Getting trampled by a Spinosaurus, as seen in the video below, does not look fun! The silver lining in this situation: At least he’s already a goner before chowtime!


Video via Movieclips


Ready for some more dino-deaths? One thing's for sure: Jurassic World is the only theme park we're visiting this week.

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