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Sep 1, 2011
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After hearing so much buzz about it, Zombadings: Patayin sa Shokot si Remington, the latest movie by Raymond Lee (of Ang Pagdadalaga ni Maximo Oliveros fame) and Jade Castro (of Endo fame) is finally out. And you know what, it’s hella funny.



It’s a story about a boy, Remington, cursed to become a homosexual, and who does so, transforms to be, at a time where a serial killer killing homosexuals is on a prowl.

While the plot and the premise could be tighter—that the gays turn into zombies seems like an afterthought, some critics say—we believe the script and the acting really brought home the point. And given that gay language (Beckimon, we learned from spot.ph) is incredibly dynamic, and therefore hard to commit to paper lest it sounds dated, we commend first, the writers for coming up with fresh words and phrases; and second, the actors for being able to make those not-so-up-to-date words and phrases sound relevant and new. Nasa delivery, we think!


                                                     Above: perfectly-delivered acting

The language is a different dialect altogether, we know. So much so that Zombadings had to use captions to get the thought across. Now, because we know you will get confused with the language, and because we highly recommend you to see the movie, we’ve prepared a short list of words you might have to look out for in the movie, for you to fully understand and appreciate the film. Award!

1. Inidora the explorer. {Eeneedorah the eksplorer} n. where you sit down to take a dump. Synonyms: toilet seat. Or better: kubeta. For example: Na-je-jebs na ko. San kaya may inadora the explorer?

2. Tualay {toowuhley} n. What you use dry yourself after shower. Synonyms: Towel. Tuwalya.
For example: Ayaw ni misis na may naiiwang basang tualay sa sahig ng banyo.

3. Award {award} adj. 1. What you say when expressing deep admiration for something someone had done.  Can also be used as sarcasm. Synonyms: Ang galing!
For example: 1. Ang ganga ng FHM cover nitong September! Award. 2. Delayed ng isang oras ang flight natin. Award talaga itong chorvalin airlines!


                 Example 3: Ang galing nga naman ng mga batang aktor sa pelikulang ito. Award!

4. Plangak {puh-la-ngak} n. What you say when responding in affirmation to a query, or in agreement to a statement. In Filipino, “oo!” Synonyms: yeah, yup, yessir. For example: Plangak, magandang pelikula nga ang Zombadings!

5. Shokot {Shee-yoh-kot} n. What you feel when someone tells you a duly believable ghost story, when you hear about heinous terrorist acts in the news or when you’ve just taken a dump in a toilet in some random gas station and find out that there’s no more tissue paper. Synonyms: terror, dread, sindak, takot. For example: Mamatay kaya sa shokot si Remington sa pelikulang Zombadings 1?

6. Fosey {pho-sey} n. A mechanical apparatus which controls the flow of water Synonyms: gripo, tap. For example: Tumawag ka ng tubero. Yung tunay na tubero ha, sira na naman ang fosey!


                                                            "Ikaw, tubero ka ba?"

7. Lamboomboompochi {lam-boom-boom-pow-tsi} n. a basin connected to a drain where you wash your dirty dishes in, or your feet too if you’re flexible and the thought of doing it in the bathroom bores you. Synonyms: sink, lababo. For example: Nakaka-shokot na yung lamboomboompochi ninyo, mukha nang inidora-the-explorer! Linisin mo naman!

8. Salaminchenelin {sa-la-meen-tse-ne-leen} n. A magical reflective surface that allows humans to check themselves out to sate their appetite for vanity. Synonyms: mirror. For example: Walang kakayahang baguhin ng salaminchenelin ang pangit na katotohanan na nasa harap nito.

9. Timbaleigh {teem-bah-ley} n. a cylindrical container made for the purpose of collecting liquids. Synonyms: bucket, pail, timba, balde. For example: Isarado mo ang fosey, puno na ang timbaleigh.

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10. Doorlalu {dor-la-loo} n. What you open to enter a room. Synonyms: door, pintuan. For example: Buksan mo nga yung doorlalu, at papasukin ang tubero.

WORDS BY: LOU ALBANO & GELO GONZALES
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