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Oct 13, 2011
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A remake of The Thing is opening this week, sparking talks about how Hollywood is yet again running out of ideas. We have high hopes for the movie, which is actually a prequel to master of horror John Carpenter’s 1982 classic of the same name (Please, please don’t mess it up!). The original film starred a badass Kurt Russel, battling out with a shape-shifting alien life form in the chilling landscape of Antarctica.

In the new film, a team of young scientists discovers the copycat-creature at the alien craft’s research site, letting loose the murderous abomination. As expected in movies, scientists do more bad than good. They experiment with organisms that inadvertently mutate into civilization-wiping super viruses.

Their solutions to prevent meteors from destroying our home planet rarely work unless they enlist the help of Bruce Willis. And when they invent something that could possibly change the world, say an infinite energy source, they use it in impractical ways (we’re looking at you, Tony Stark).

Tired of unoriginality and in the spirit of creepy, otherworldly beings, we decided to play mad scientist ourselves and conjure for you guys our version of the ultimate “thing”. The original part: using different body parts from pop culture icons. Dr. Frankenstein would be proud!

monster

WORDS BY ANTON D. UMALI & GELO GONZALES
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