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Dec 23, 2013
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The Metro Manila Film Festival is known for two things: 1) underwhelming movies; 2) parade floats.

Last week, we focused on item No. 1. This week, with the annual Parade of Stars of the 39th Metro Manila Film Festival happening yesterday, December 22, at the Mall of Asia area, we focus on item No. 2: the floats.

We put our asar-dealing, pikon-dishing hats on, and poke fun at these parade contraptions! 


1) 10,000 Hours starring Robin Padilla

The good:  The houses make those big stars, Robin Padilla and the gang, look even bigger.

The bad:
The houses look like those squatter cover-up walls that the government sometimes put up to make the city look less dirty.


2) Pagpag: Siyam Na Buhay
starring Daniel Padilla and Kathryn Bernardo

The good: It's Optimus Prime being devoured by the hand of Diablo himself.

The bad:
Where are the wheels? How is it even running?

The awesome:
It's probably a converted dump truck.


3) Pedro Calungsod: Batang Martir
starring Rocco Nacino

The good:  It's a ship with Pedro Calungsod's face on it.

The bad: Pedro Calungsod apparently has life insurance as per that logo on the top side.

The awesome:
The castle at the back is straight out of Super Mario.


4) Girl, Boy, Bakla, Tomboy
starring Vice Ganda

The good: It's Santa's giant sleigh.

The bad:
The deluge of colors will have no effect on the color blind.

The awesome:
WTF! Is that Vice Ganda in a Christmas sock?


NEXT: Who are you trying to shoot Boy Golden?!


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