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How To Survive The Next Nights After Watching 'The Conjuring 2'

Let's put our hands together, 'Conjuring 2' survivors
by Gari Vinluan | Jun 14, 2016
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When there’s something strange in your neighborhood, who are you going to call? Not the Ghostbusters. But The Warrens.

The Conjuring 2 is a cut above your standard horror sequel. The second offering from James Wan is macabre cinema that proves that the devil is in the details—specifically, crucifixes turned upside down and the most terrifying nun we've ever seen in horror cinema. There's a reason why Wan is widely considered as the best in modern horror filmmaking. The way he constructs his jump scares, and the skill with which he builds up the anticipation towards the scares is somewhat unmatched.


The short of it: The movie will be keeping you up for the next few nights.

Stepping outside the moviehouse, you'll still feel the horror of Enfield. It’s like a bitter aftertaste. Imagine being alone in your apartment or your room, and dealing with imagery from the movie still playing in your head. We know you feel the same, so don't deny it.

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Let's all accept that the flick scared our pants off, and we'll just have to deal with it. We have a few words of advice here:

1) If you’re a big Marilyn Manson fan, maybe for a few nights, try to veer away from listening to this shock rocker.

This is because Marilyn Manson looks like Valak, the demonic nun who made us remember all the childhood stories about ghostly nuns. We can still vividly remember how menacing and haunting the look on that demonic nun's face was. She’s the reason sweet dreams won’t be made of these for the next few nights.

So skip the Manson, and give Creed a listen. Actually, don't. That's even scarier.


2) Actually, maybe thinking about Valak as nothing more than a Marilyn Manson clone would help.

Marilyn Manson is just some dude with heavy makeup and contact lenses—essentially a metal drag queen. And Valak is just his long-lost bro (or sis?). 

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3) Visit your grandfather.

That should wash away your thoughts of the ghostly grandpa in the film. Hang out with them and let them tell you stories about World War II or something. That should erase Conjuring 2's image of granddads as possessed lunatics. If your granddad happened to have passed away already, give him a visit too. Or do you want him to do the visiting?

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4) Avoid rocking chairs in the meantime.

We like rocking chairs. It gives us a certain bit of nostalgia. But in the meantime, you can do without it. You can always blame the wind when it rocks, but with the windows shut and it still rocks? NOPE.

5) Avoid staring into hallways

Because what if a ghostly nun suddenly runs towards you? You can never tell, bro.

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6) Never develop a fascination toward a zoetrope

The zoetrope, as you've seen in the movie, is a device that produces the illusion of motion by displaying a sequence of drawings or photographs showing progressive phases of that motion. We're not sure if that's a common artifact in the country but regardless. Anything that turns with images etched around it? It would be better if they are to be away for now.


7) Do the ol' leave-the-lights-on-trick-at-night

We've been told that sleeping with the lights open will not break the bank. So, for a few days, do that. Just use eye masks if the lights irritate you.

8) Watch a rom-com

We've been doing the said seven ways since we watched it over the weekend. And sometimes the images come back no matter how hard we try. So here's the eight way: Watch romantic comedy films. Try The Fault In Our Stars. It will break your heart, but at least you're not scared anymore! And hey, at least you'll look like MJ:

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