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The Desert-Hot Babes Of Mad Max: Fury Road Will Definitely Make You Thirsty

AKA if you don't click on this link, we're going to have to take your man-card.
by Anton D. Umali | May 14, 2015
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Mad Max: Fury Road hits theaters today and you have more than enough reason (six hot ones, in fact!) to get your ass to the nearest theater and see it. Aside from the universal acclaim international critics are giving it, the promise of twisted metal, and the potent dose of nostalgia it will give fans of the Mel Gibson-fronted flicks, the fourth installment in director George Miller’s post-apocalyptic franchise sees a tribe of desert-hot women with killer names on the run from a tyrannical fascist named King Immortan Joe.

Led by the hard-as-nails Imperator Furiosa (played by mega-babe Charlize Theron), the Five Wives endure the heat of sand and sun to escape the clutches of their tormentor. In true Mad Max fashion, hardcore brotagonist Tom Hardy (who fills the shoes Gibson once filled) aids these tough lassies into liberation. Below, check out why Max couldn’t help but go out of his way to get angry for these scantily clad sweat-inducers. Spoiler: they’re sexy as fuck!

Charlize Theron as Imperator

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There have been so many movies where this award-winning silver screen goddess has had you lusting for her golden good looks. Anyone remember that hot scene from the Devil’s Advocate?  If you’re too young to recall her skills at upping a film’s level of sexiness, her role as the greased up, baldheaded, baddie-beating biatch in Fury Road will show you just exactly how potent her onscreen presence is. Even with a shaved head, Charlize is still capable of turning half-chubs into a full-on pants-tight experience.

Rosie Huntington-Whitely as The Splendid Angharad

Fresh off the runways of New York, Paris, and Milan, the former Victoria’s Secret angel is slowly making her name as a box-office sweetheart. Sure, Transformers: Dark of the Moon was kind of suck-y to say the least, but being accorded the chance to see Rosie run away from villains with ill intent is always a welcomed pleasure.

Last night @madmaxmovie premiere in Hollywood wearing @officialrodarte ❤️🌹

A photo posted by Rosie Huntington-Whiteley (@rosiehw) on

Zoe Kravitz as Toast the Knowing

She’s rock and roll royalty because of her funkadelic dad Lenny Kravitz. But this caramel-skinned stunner has already penetrated the pop-culture subconscious by appearing in a number of modern-day cult films like X-Men: First Class and the Divergent series. It seems that she fancies high-octane action, which is really what any man wants in a woman.

Thank you so much for helping me look all purdy ! @ajmukamal |  @karayoshimotobua | @jcolbysmith | @maisonvalentino 😘😘😘😘

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A photo posted by Zoë Kravitz (@zoeisabellakravitz) on

Abbey Lee as The Dag

The dominantly male-viewing audience that will be seeing Fury Road are going to have a hoot from the fact that you get three Victoria’s Secret models in the damsel in distress lineup. Like Rosie and Riley Keough below, this Aussie catwalk honey appeared in the VS fashion shows, getting her turn in 2008 and 2009. With her ethereally blonde locks and nymphet face (not to mention her smokin’ bod), you’re bound to see more of her in the future. 

Courtney Eaton as Cheedo the Fragile

Rounding out this gang of gorgeousness is another native from Down Under. With a dark mane that frames her supple features like a work of art, she’s the group’s most inexperienced in terms of work. But based on the infamy the film’s been getting, Ms. Eaton should have no problem raking in the roles come end credits.

A photo posted by COURTNEY EATON (@courteaton) on

Riley Keough as Capable

With a name like Capable, how the hell could director George Miller go wrong in casting this piercingly attractive specimen of the female form? If you thought Zoe Kravitz was a blue-blooded rock legacy, Riley here is the granddaughter of The King himself, Elvis Presley. Thank you, thank you very much, Mr. Miller!

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Dirty south vibe #yolo #wafflehouse 🍗

A photo posted by Riley Keough (@rileykeough) on

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