The 2014 FIBA World Cup, also known as the "World Cup That Filipinos Actually Want To See," tips off on Saturday, August 30, in Spain. We're ready. We hope Gilas Pilipinas is ready, and that their non-stellar showing in recent tune-up games is not an indication of their future performances. (In other words, please win a few games, Gilas!)
In case they don't, we'll just have to drink our hoops sorrows away. In case they do win, we'll also drink—along with the many other times we'll down shots according to our FIBA World Cup Drinking Game! Ready the bottles, get the shot glasses out, and pray your liver holds up!
TAKE A SHOT IF:
1) Jimmy Alapag hits a three. Take an extra shot if it's in the last two minutes of the game.
If it's in the last two minutes of the game, and the shot takes the lead away from the opponent, do Vince Carter's patented "It's Over" celebration.
2) Jayson Castro takes it strong to the paint, and finishes a lay-up. Take an extra shot if it's an and-one play.
If he sinks the and-one free throw, do Antoine Walker's patented "Shimmy Shake."
3) Paul Lee hits a free throw in the last minute of the game. Take five extra shots if the free throws are of the game-winning, no-time-left-on-the-clock variety.
Then make sure to do Sam Cassell's patented "Hugo Huevos" dance right after.