The dust has settled on Week 1 of the 2014 FIFA World Cup, with all the teams done playing their first games. What have we learned? It’s a good time for goals!
Here’s a recap of how the groups look leading into Week 2, and all the good stuff that went down!
Brazil is first as expected, but the fan favorites haven’t convinced skeptics 100-percent with their sometimes-shaky display against Croatia. The Mexicans are second, but they aren’t heavily favored over the two other teams, so there’s still all to play for in round two.
Cameroonian midfielder Alex Song elbowed Croatia striker Mario Mandzukic, but that didn’t stop the striker from scoring in their 4-0 win. The fact that he got his stupid ass sent off probably didn’t help either. Even more violence in the form of “friendly fire”:
MAYBE THAT’S HOW PEOPLE GREET EACH OTHER IN AFRICA??? Well, there’s going to be a whole lot of head-butting soon because they’re going home.
Meanwhile, increasingly underwhelming Brazil played out a 0-0 draw with Mexico thanks to this guy:
Aside from totally outshining Neymar, he even out-haired him. Muy Bien! Status quo maintained in Group A, unlike…
The Dutch absolutely slaughtered Spain, 5-1, in the highly-anticipated rematch of 2010’s final. Robin Van Persie’s soaring header was no doubt the meme of the week, but that really was a hell of a goal! #Persieing
Meanwhile, Chile beat the Aussies, 3-1, to leave La Furia Roja dead last, who would have thought huh? Who will all the bandwagon fans cheer if they go out!?
THEY’RE OUT!!! SPAIN IS OUT!!!