Yo dawg! Do you have a car that Oscar The Grouch would be proud of? Do tow trucks routinely circle your vehicle like vultures? Is there a 90 percent chance that you'll contract tetanus every time you plop down in your automobile? Then boy do we have the solution for you: MTV's Pimp My Ride—that is, if we were still living in the early 2000s.
The MTV hit show hosted by pimpin' rapper Xzibit had a simple hook: let's turn your old, ugly car into a super-flashy, blinged-out ugly car. The outrageous set-ups were something. Oftentimes, we didn't know what they were; just that they were...something.
While we shared in the joys of the over-ecstatic car owner seeing his pimped-out car for the first time, a recent report by Huffingtonpost.com has revealed that the show wasn't all neon paint and rainbows. Talking to three of the kids who got their cars pimped (Jake Glazier from Season 4 and Seth Martino and Justin Dearinger from Season 6), the site revealed some pretty interesting behind-the-scenes bits from the show.
Below are nine of these childhood-ruining revelations!
1) The Pimp My Ride pimpee doesn't always get to keep all the goods we see being installed!
Them crazy PMR fellas put in some pretty crazy stuff in the cars during the show's run from 2004 to 2007. But the car owners sometimes didn't get to take home those things.
In Justin Dearinger's case, he didn't get to take home a "pop-up" champagne contraption and a fancy car TV set-up he called a "drive-in theater." One other car owner didn't get to take home 24-inch spinner rims.
There's a reason though. Co-executive producer Larry Hochberg said that some removals were necessary out of safety reasons—a claim that Dearinger himself confirms, saying that the champagne contraption promoted drinking-and-driving while the theater was not safe for driving.
2) Not all those TV screens actually work (among other things)!
Image via Gizmodo.com
With all those TVs, lights, and electronic components, some of them were bound to conk out. Seth Martino complained that the television screens never worked again after filming and the LED lights installed on his chair proved to be too impractically hot for his butt.
The gull-wing doors that swung upwards were also taken away after filming since they prohibited the seatbelt function at the back. The cotton candy machine installed in the trunk also didn't work as planned as cotton candy strands flew all over the car.
The lesson here: while those miscellaneous additions are flashy, they rarely improve the driving experience.
3) Oftentimes, it was all flash and no substance!
Sure the rides looked fancy, but beyond that bright exterior, "there were a lot of problems" according to Jake Glazier.
After the car rolled out of PMR's garages, the owners would sometimes find out that their cars needed more work to make it a functional regular driver, with some of them having to spend a lot more money to get their cars working.
Their own money! The abomination!
4) One of the cars pimped by the show eventually exploded!
Dearinger, the dude who got his pop-up champagne contraption taken back by the show, proceeded to do extra work on his car. Five years after the show, the car burst into flames, with him and his girlfriend being able to get out just moments before the car exploded.
5) Those super-excited shots during reveals were staged!
Remember those moments when the owners would just freak out after seeing their cars?
Here's a reminder:
Video via VisionOnDuty
Apparently, some of them were staged. Glazier recalls his experience after his not-so-enthusiastic reaction:
"I remember this very clearly, Big Dane, very big dude, he like puts his arm around my shoulder, kind of walks me around the shop for like 10 minutes and he's like, 'Listen, we put a lot of work into this... We expect you to be a little more fucking enthusiastic.'"
So he did this:
Image via Huffingtonpost.com
6) It took months to pimp a ride rather than a couple of days as the show would have you believe!
Thanks to the show's editing, it might seem like it took just days to fix a ride up. The truth is the owners had to wait for months!
Martino had a particularly rough time where he had to rent out a place with his own money while the repairs went on for months. MTV paid for the rent for only a couple of months before he had to pay with his own money. What he did was he held onto receipts before MTV reimbursed him, two years after the show aired.
7) Some of the cars were uglified before being pimped!
Some cars just weren't ugly enough, so MTV did a number of things to make things uglier. What things? Sometimes they threw an "extra few dozen cigarette butts in the car," according to Glazier They also rubbed off more of the paint and took off the bumper of Dearinger's car.
8) The participant's personalities also got the pimp treatment
Image via Huffingtonpost.com
In the same way that the cars didn't look ugly enough, sometimes the owners weren't interesting enough. Martino, a rather plump guy, was shocked when MTV went the extra mile to highlight his full-figured-ness by dumping two bags of generic candy in his car.
One other suggestion was for an owner to dump his girlfriend to make him appear like he's become a "playa" because of the pimped ride.
The producer, Hochberg, had this to say: "Why would we want a kid to break up with his girlfriend? How would that have helped the show?"
9) Xzibit's a really cool guy
Alright, Xzibit was a really memorable part of the show. But was he as cool as he looked? Apparently yes.