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Oct 4, 2014
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After a night of passionate lovemaking with the girl of your dreams, you wake up all alone in a motel with P200 beside you. You try texting, calling, and sending her private messages via Facebook and Viber.

She never answers back.

Then, it dawns on you. Katawan lang ang habol niya sa'yo.

Congrats, bro. You are now officially “boy-toy material.”

It has happened to us so many times before, but we never learn. Ewan ko ba. Why do we let these mapansamantalang demonyitas to use our bodies just to satisfy their carnal appetites? We have feelings, too. Hindi tayo mga boy-toy lamang. Memories come rushing back to me while I type away on my laptop, reminding me of the many times I’ve been violated by women who were just after my body.

It hurts. I’m a human being, not an object. ‘Di ba nila alam yun???

It begs the question, why do these diabolical bruhas manipulate us into giving them the best sex they’ve ever had, tapos iiwan lang tayong luhaan? The answer is simple: Ang lalakeng lumilibog ay lalakeng bumoboboWomen know our weak spot; ganun sila katinik.

But fear not, fellow manyaks! I’ve decoded these evil creatures (I think other people still refer to them as “women”), thanks to the many times my body has been ravaged by them.  

Women are a lot like men, especially when it comes to sex. After they climax, tinutulugan nila tayo. They don’t like cuddling and saying sweet nothings to us–‘di na raw kasi uso. All they do is take and take! (It’s one of the reasons why a lot of us end up doing it alone in the bathroom.)

So I say, enough of that! Don’t let women use you the way they did in the past. Study these signs that the girl you’re bedding is just in it for sex and memorize them by heart. Here now are the seven signs na katawan lang ang habol ni girlie sa'yo!


Sign #1: She contacts you only during “booty call” hours

It’s one thing when a girl texts you at 9 a.m., saying, “Good morning, don’t forget to eat breakfast.” It’s another thing when she sends you a message at midnight, saying “What are you wearing tonight?”

If the latter happens more than the former, you know what she’ll say next. “Um, mag-isa lang ako sa bahay ehSamahan mo naman ako” or “Tara, let’s hang out! Masarap daw yung sisig sa Sogo.”

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Guys, huwag kayong bibigay. Respect yourself enough to at least make pakipot. Unless of course she sends you a paano-ka-hihindi video clip such as this:


Sign #2: She calls you only when it’s convenient for her

Special occasions or long weekends are reserved for special people–for men whom girls want a serious relationship with. Malas mo na lang 'cause you’re not a “special someone.”

If her main man is busy, you’re the one who’s next in line. You’re the replacement, the panakip-butas…the taga-salo. Sorry, pare. She will never contact you on her birthday or even on a public holiday.

Also, haven't you heard of APO Hiking Society's advice?


NEXT: She's always like, "Ay, huwag ka na pumunta. Andun kasi yung friends ko eh. Kthnxbye!" 


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