So, you’re crushing on a hot chick—and she happens to be filthy rich. She has a personal chauffeur and she lives in a gated subdivision in Alabang where even tricycles are not allowed. You, on the other hand, have to beg for barya from your friends just to pay for your one-year subscription to FHM.
It sounds like a poorly-written plot for a telenovela, but it’s actually the story of your life. How do you become the bida who wins her heart after thirteen episodes, especially if there’s a rich and pogi kontrabida trying to woo her, too?
Women fall for the underdog—in telenovelas, that is. In real life, that rarely happens.
But that’s what I’m here for. Allow me to share with you a few suggestions on how to earn pogi points with that rich girl—and don’t worry, you don’t have to spend a single penny.
#TiwalaLang, bro! Sobra, sobrang tiwala!
Remember The Three Stages of (Rich Girl) Courtship!
Panliligaw is like a game: As you move from one stage to the next, it gets harder. In every courtship, there are three stages that you have to go through to emerge the victor: Landi, Lambing, and Kiliti.
Stage 1: LANDI - “Kung sino ang bumigay, siya ang talo!”
Ligaw is usually not part of a rich girl’s vocabulary, especially if she’s the type who’s used to partying all night, spending summer in Boracay, and going to Paris for an annual shopping spree. However, they are familiar with the word porma. “Homaygosh, John Lloyd is like making porma to me on Twitter! He’s like so sweet kaya!”
Of course, not every rich girl is conyo—but one thing is for sure: most of them prefer guys who are equally rich as they are, handsome, or both. And if you’re neither, you will need lakas ng loob, kapal ng mukha, and a whole lot of swerte to pull this off.
1) Remember: Suplado is the new sexy. Rich girls are used to having all the attention they want and need—and if she thinks you don’t give a damn, she will start wondering why. Dapat, pa-mysterious effect para mapansin ka!
2) Be the funny guy. Ramon Bautista, Tado, and Sam YG. Self-explanatory.
3) You don’t have to be rich as long as you look rich. Okay lang maging mahirap, kesa mayaman ka nga mukha ka namang pulubi!
4) Maintain visibility. She’s already curious about you because you’re suplado. Turn her curiosity into obsession by being available but scarce! If she keeps running into you and you don’t act like any of her uto-uto suitors, she will keep wondering why you’re not into her.
But don't saw "Ewww" every time you see her...suwabe lang dapat
5) Send her mixed signals. Follow her on Instagram, but not on Twitter. Like her comment on Facebook, but if she thanks you don’t answer back. Girls like decoding boys, and they are fascinated by guys they can’t quite figure out.
NEXT: Make LAMBING and KILITI!
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