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A Guy's Short Guide To Pulling Off Short Shorts

You don't want to look sexier than your girlfriend, do you?
by Ash Mahinay | Apr 5, 2016
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Guys, it’s fine to wear these thigh-baring things. What is not okay however, is wearing them in an eyesore manner. So here are five quick tips before you run out and grab a pair.

1) Don’t wear a tiny shirt with your small shorts

Have you heard of the big fabric shortage? No? Wearing a virtual baby tee is not sexy, and the inevitable midriff exposure when you do anything but stand perfectly straight will jump your bare skin total into danger zone levels immediately.

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2) Wear shoes please

Unless you are on the beach, please wear shoes with your shorts. Wearing slippers with your thigh-high bottoms leaves you mere inches away from looking like those dudes who go out of the house in their boxers.


3) Make sure your shorts are actually short and not just…small

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Don’t cheat by pulling out a pair of shorts from high school and calling it fashion–even if you can somehow still wrestle them onto your hips. Short shorts are constructed to have proper proportions aside from their abbreviated length. Basically, they won’t turn your thighs into a vision of lumpia gone wrong.

 Go HAM on patterns and colors

If you have conservative KJ friends, they’ll likely zero in on the length factor rather than the fact that your shorts have flowers/polka dots/crocodiles on them. If they rage at your shorts and the things on them, you got to wonder why they are so affected by your wardrobe choices to begin with.

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5) If people complain that “Eww, dami mo buhok fam”

Just tell them you have a lot of testosterone!


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